TheLookoutDiary

DON’T CHASE GIRLS IF YOU WANT A GOOD LIFE

In Relationships, Self Help on September 6, 2012 at 6:42 pm

If you want a good or fruitful life, don’t chase girls. They will seriously slow you down.

Everyone wants the perfect relationship, or the relationship that lasts forever. We all want it, most of us are positively driven human beings.

I went to college for induction recently, and my first instinct was ‘wow, look at all these beautiful women.’ Now, I knew to myself, if I talk to these girls, friend zone and brother Derrick comes out. And clearly they will be a distraction. I need to focus and lay the foundations for my future.

This is and was my solution. Admire from a far. Work hard so I get the ideal life I aspire to get. Be myself and do everything in my power to make sure every action or word Derrick comes out with, is truly honest, and valuable.

Girls will slow you down, if you don’t understand why you are educating yourself in an educational institution. The girls that truly appreciate you and care for you will not bother you when you invest in your future by investing in something so powerful called knowledge. Girls that aren’t at your level will make reasons why you should be hanging out with them instead of getting the grades. They won’t out right say that, but their approach is deadly.

Why would you want to get into a relationship that doesn’t help you develop as a person, but belittles your potential. Who can you talk to that appreciates you and what you have to say, and wants to support you?

Little Story:

I was at break for 20 minutes at college. I was hanging out with my friends Geneva and Darren (most kindest and loveliest couple in school). I was talking to them about general things, summer break, and ambitions. I saw this lonely girl by herself, who was in my old class, before I moved to a new class in the same morning. My college sometimes have classes with over capacity at the start of the year. Well a part of me was thinking introduce myself, get to know new people. And a part of me was saying, no need, first day, CONCENTRATE! 

I was having two voices in my head. My friend Ali, who taught me everything I knew about women this year, would say ‘Derrick, grow some balls, and talk to her, you never know.’ My brother Etim would say ‘Why would you do it? What are you gaining from it. You go to college to learn so go with the flow of education and a woman will be in your path and direction of travel. May be next to you, may be in front or behind you, but definitely valuable when she and you find each other.’ So I ducked out and continued my day, and I can honestly say, I don’t feel regret. 

Balancing personal and social development is so key to achieving the best from life. Some people chase money, some chase love, some chase girls and some people simply chase.  So my advice to all the people reading is admire, invest, go with your individual flow and enjoy the wait for the right person.

If you want to be the top lawyer in the country, or the best music artist, or the next specialist doctor, why would you consume your valuable time trying to attract girls. I thought women like guys who are themselves. Giving mixed messages of your pretend and real character can damage how you interact with women and what they think of you. If you are pretentious and a girl gives into it, then she won’t like your honest character. And don’t be yourself  in front of a girl then change to a pretentious character to overly impress a girl. It just isn’t cool.

Let life take control!

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