TheLookoutDiary

Archive for October, 2012|Monthly archive page

LONGEST DAY EVER

In Self Expression on October 24, 2012 at 8:15 pm

I woke up this morning 6:00am on the dot. Jumped into the bath, ate breakfast by 7 and left my house by 7:10am. I was heading to the Passport Office in Victoria. I am going away to Tenerife for five days during half term break. I left my house prepared and ready for action. I get to the train station and the trains are running late. I was going to meet my mum’s friend at Tower Hill station so I can get counter signatures done for my passport application. The train being late, gets me to Tower Hill not at 8:15am when I was expected to be there, but 8:30, half an hour till my passport appointment. I am rushing at this point, but I stay calm. I remember that I am missing an English lesson at college at the same time, only because I am getting a new passport on the same day. I hate missing lessons!

I get to the passport office, after getting lost in Victoria. I then got a free taxi ride, for 30 seconds. I couldn’t even position myself on my Blackberry Google Maps. At the passport office they search me and when I walk through the metal detectors, the guy searching me closely starts  making jokes with me about having metal on me. I point to my belt. I jump through the long queue for processing, and I realise when I am getting my passport application sorted, my photo ID’s are lost. I have to run to Victoria Station, get cash out, and take fresh pictures in the station. I take my pictures to the people at the passport office and they say my head is too shiny. I go, wipe my head hard, and take new pictures in the passport office. Now, I am really frustrated because of the long process and me thinking I would get to college at 9:45 for my English lesson. Let’s just say, it was still 9:30 and I am in Victoria, making jokes with the assistants. I go back, give my new pictures to the woman who is sorting out my passport and this time, my head is dry and spotty. Picture perfect.

Leaving the passport office, I am heading to college. I remember that this is the day when I am supposed to perform my poetry at the talent showcase at college.

I reach college, type up my poetry, sign it for authenticity, and next I go and give a presentation to my form class about blogging, the benefits and how the college can adopt such a lovely, creative, powerful tool for expression. After the presentation, I walk downstairs in the main building at college. I see one of the most beautiful, beautiful black girls I have ever seen. Of course, I raised my voice, acted confident and dominated myself and where I was. I caught her attention for a split second. Smiled and waved. I don’t know if I will get to talk to her at some point in school. Carrying on from my distant encounter with the beautiful girl, I met my poet/freestyle/rapper friend Pelumi, and go down to Tesco to raid it’s fridges for food for the day. I am a beast at that point, because all poets need extra water and food in preparations for a performance. Getting back, I practice with my poetry mentors and then off I go to the talent show.

Me practicing my poetry in a little French room in college, in front of other poets was not so great, but when I went on stage I felt invincible. I noticed millions of girls in the crowd and just went into it (the poem will be posted soon). I was happy with my performance. I got the reaction I expected, and felt like every talent and performance by all the artists today, was exceptionally creative and I am happy I signed up to perform.

Poetry allows me to open up on my emotions, become clear of my emotions like how blogging allows me to make sense of what is happening in my life.

I am so satisfied with my day, and I can honestly say college can only get better in time. *plays Frank Ocean – Channel Orange*

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PLEASING PEOPLE

In Relationships, Self Help on October 21, 2012 at 10:31 am

You know when you do something to please someone?

You know when you do something to make someone like you?

You know when you lose your own sense of identity because you adapted to the personality that fits another person you are trying to impress?

We all know that feeling. The feeling like our own self worth is less than the other person. The feeling of lack of satisfaction, because we lack entertainment in our own lives. It is truly present in today’s society, especially with the rise in advanced technological communications. We all want to please people, because we want to get along with them, and hopefully build a strong friendship with them.

The important question is this: When does our pleasing people personality become detrimental to our own personal developing personality?

I think personally, as long as you don’t go beyond your values and beliefs, and you are aware of what pleasing you are doing, then I think it is perfectly okay. As long as you don’t lose your standpoint, your grounded identity, I guess you can adapt to someone else’s way of life. We all have to do it, because we have to compromise in a life, where everyone has difference. It makes the world a tad more entertaining. Thank God for DNA.

Never do something to please someone unless you truly mean it. Only please someone when you know the outcome is going to make you a stronger, more intelligent, more aware individual. So don’t like Bridget Jones, because the girl you are attracted to likes Bridget Jones. Continue to like Avatar or Spiderman and hope that she accepts you for who you are, and vice versa.

NEVER EVER ASSUME

In Self Help on October 14, 2012 at 11:51 pm

” Assume nothing, question everything ” – James Patterson

One key lesson, I have learned from life is to never assume anything. I have to also admit that I personally love making assumptions. I get a thrill from assuming things, as long as my assumptions don’t jeapardise my flow of life (ie. friendship development or well being). A lot of people make assumptions based on appearance and that is clearly shallow, since you can’t judge a book by it’s cover and you cannot be absolutely certain about anything without actual experience.

For me, a lot of the things I like, don’t relate to my appearance. My clothing style is smart and really casual. Behind my black skin, and dress code, is not a book worm or library worm, but a guy who loves hip hop, loves to write, loves the concept of travelling and a plane enthusiast. Also I really like being social with people, but if you saw me behind a white screen, you couldn’t predict those things about me. You would naturally have a list of ideas. I went out today, with my friends to Heathrow Airport to take pictures of planes, and we all dressed as if we were going to skate. We got a few weird looks since we didn’t have suitcases or big luggage bags, but once we all took out our camera phones, and SLR cameras, people were just thinking ‘plane spotters?’ The thing about that particular experience, is that we look like typical teenagers that would go out and skate (we do), go cinema, and play computer games. Actually, our interests and hobbies all centralised around planes and travelling, while we all have particular interests. One of my friends likes photography, another likes martial arts, another likes aviation, and I love to write.

When you assume, you are either trying to solve something quickly, move quickly from point A to point B or simply don’t feel secure with exploration. When I don’t assume, the journey of life becomes more interesting, because I notice things I would have never noticed, if I made a quick judgement. Also when you spend time getting to know people, not for their looks, but their character, you have more of a chance of meeting people that would be great friends of yours, best friends, potential boyfriends/girlfriends and just amazing people who could be life changing.

The question is why would you want to make an assumption on someone who you don’t know? Why don’t you want to forget about appearance, even though appearance is a natural occurrence in attraction? Maybe assume less, and explore more is the way forward.

WHY ARE GOOD PEOPLE HARD TO FIND?

In Relationships, Self Help on October 4, 2012 at 9:26 pm

I am confident that, in the end, common sense and justice will prevail. I’m an optimist, brought up on the belief that if you wait to the end of the story, you get to see the good people live happily ever after. – Cat Stevens

I never understood that. I know the world has a lot of awful people. We have terrorists, we have rapists, murderers, pedophiles and crazies. One thing, I never understood is why good people are hard to find. I mean, if everyone is trying to be the best they can be, how come it is hard to find a person that matches your character.

Life throws challenges at us everyday. Challenges that make us think hard. Challenges that make us temporarily fall. Challenges that stretch us way past our comfort zone. The people that stick by you when you go through challenges, and notice and endure your absolute low, and absolute high, are the people that are good and worthwhile people to invest in the long run.

The thing is, everyone’s interpretation of good is different, so I guess it is up to us as human beings to really look deep in ourselves and ask ourselves these two questions:

1. What is a good person to us?

2. Are we willing to be patient, learn from ourselves and learn from others, while being open, so we can increase the chance of meeting a good person that fits our character.

Good people are rare because what one person may think is a good person, another person might think of as a devil. For me, I have met good people, and I have also met bad people. I just want to keep investing in those rare people, while hoping for the best with everyone else I meet in my lifetime.

MY PLAN FROM NOW TO 2013

In Travel on October 4, 2012 at 4:50 pm

So since my life has shifted majorly in the last 24 hours, I have made a plan for what I hope to achieve from now to Septembers 2013. I thought I would share it with my fellow bloggers.

1. College: I am going to be focusing solely on college this year. I want to not just pass, but pass exceptionally well. I want to make sure that I am achieving my best in all my classes, not just the best in the class, if you get what I mean. So that means achieving A’s and Distinctions in Media: Video Applied, Literature and Business (my lovely subjects).

2. TheLookoutDiary: I hope to be able to push my blog and further and become more established in my love for writing. Hopefully think of new ventures. Something I am keeping a secret from all of you bloggers out there. I want to be the best at my game. It’s a game because I love it so much.

3. New York or San Diego: I hope to fly over to either one of these two places next year, as an individual taking his first trip alone without family. I don’t even want to bring any friends. I want to have an individual experience.

4. Make New Friends: I want to use this year not to only focus on ambitions, but build relationships with people. Meaningful people that can help me grow as an individual. People that I can share amazing experiences with. But not travel with…..yet. Like I said, first trip is alone. I am definitely willing to have people on the second one.

5. ME: I simply want to be myself, and not project myself as anything or anyone but me. Identity in CHEEECCCKKK! 

CHANGE

In Self Help on October 4, 2012 at 4:00 pm

You know when life says to you ‘You need to change. You need to shift from what you are doing now, to something new.’ I experienced that recently. I was had a job, and I had my fair share of challenges. The challenges kept coming, and I kept trying to solve them. I notice that a lot of the challenges I was trying to solve were out of my control. I further challenged myself to solve what was unsolvable, only because I had a lack of resources that could eradicate the problem and make me happy.

I then realised something. When you try to solve something that is so rigid, you create more problems if the problem is so against you? Why not just shift and change your lifestyle and look for better? I kept thinking that to myself for the last few weeks and realised that I need to just take the leap of faith and just do what makes me happy. I say money doesn’t bring happiness, which is absolutely true in my opinion. I also believe that just trying something new in the hope for a amazing outcome, is a massive risk, but I am willing to do it, if the reward is greatness.

The value of life lies not in the length of days, but in the use we make of them… Whether you find satisfaction in life depends not on your tale of years, but on your will. – Michel de Montaigne

So, I shifted my thought process from indulging in problems with overly complex solutions, to finding a new angle and strategy that can allow me to flourish in my talents. I hope to grow in my new venture as an individual that is on this planet to experience what life has to offer. And I am openly willing to learn, expand my knowledge, and grow into a strong man. A man that doesn’t have the muscle (wouldn’t mind) but has clarity in his reasoning, understanding and application of knowledge into the real world.

 

WHAT DRIVES MY HARD WORK. AMBITION

In Self Help on October 1, 2012 at 1:26 am

Today, I did the longest ever study session of my life, and I still feel amazing and full of energy. I started studying at 3:00pm, after going to the gym from 11:00 to 12:30 and then coming home to eat brunch and then update my Tumblr. I finished studying minutes to midnight with frequent breaks and a power nap (20mins). The best thing ever happened to me in terms understanding what drives my hard work and determination, which I didn’t have before, but started applying recently when starting college. Last year I flopped pretty much all my exams because I counted the hours I worked everyday, applying quantity rather than quality. I thought to myself if I put in 3 hours today, I will be up to scratch and be able to relax a little bit. That type of thought or drive is completely wrong and should have never been my driving force for success. It sets your up for failure and puts you on the borderline, just like it did for me.

What has started to drive me in terms of hard work and application is my ability to empty my cup (full of preconceptions of self standard) and take every learning opportunity as a new experience. In addition, I constantly think about my ambitions, and dreams in life. I used to think that success is luck, and that you don’t have to work hard, hard to become successful, but hard enough. I then realised that hard work and success differentiates you from lazy people. If you want something that is amazing, exclusive and life changing, you’re going to have to shift your mind set from doing what is necessary to do what is overcapacity so you’re full with more knowledge than you need, so you can reach further and beyond. If everyone is able to have what you want, it must mean it is cheap and quick to obtain, but if what you want is something like a million dollar mansion, of course you will have to work hard to be the best, since million dollar mansions are not available to everyone. Obviously, because there are very few millionaires on this planet. So when I think about what I want in life, I realise that they aren’t available to everyone, so as a smart individual, I have to work harder than everyone else to be on top of my game and be the be the best at whatever I am doing. I cannot settle for less, or settle at the standard of the majority, because where the majority stand is an easy and comfortable position that has many people complaining for better.

A good technique of finding your motivation to work hard is to simply write down everything you want to achieve in life, and put them in a list of importance. Then write down what you need to achieve what you want, and then just simply apply yourself after. If you have no idea what you want to achieve in life, simply work hard in everything you do, explore and become adventurous.